You may remind yourself a hundred times that you shouldn’t get angry, but when the emotion arises, you cannot control it. It comes like a thunderstorm.
Anger is not your real nature. It doesn’t allow the self to shine through fully. Showing anger itself is not wrong, but being unaware of your anger ends up hurting you more than anyone else. Sometimes you can show anger purposefully. For example, a mother gets angry at her children and can act tough or shout at them if they put themselves in danger. Some situations warrant showing anger, but when you get angry, have you observed what happens to you? You are completely shaken for a long time. Look at the consequences of getting angry. Are you happy with the decisions you have made or the words you have spoken in a state of anger? No, because you lose your awareness at that moment. But if you are completely aware and are acting angry, that is fine.
Anger and resentment have a chain reaction – you get angry and resent; resentment will then turn to anger again. Either you are angry with somebody or you are angry with yourself. You may be angry with somebody else but then, as soon as your anger fades, you resent yourself and feel, “How could I lose my temper like that?” Just get rid of resentment. Anger is part of your life. If you take away a toy from a small child, he yells and shouts, but then everything is normal the very next instant like nothing happened. Similarly, you get angry but the anger should last only as long as a line drawn over water lasts. The next moment you should start smiling again.
Now what do you do when someone behaves very rudely with you? You get upset; react rudely in return; get frustrated; avoid the person or the situation; blame the person or preach the person. None of these will in any way strengthen you.
Instead, see rude behaviour in this light:
•It indicates the intensity of their commitment
•It indicates the amount of stress and insensitivity they are carrying inside them
•It projects the upbringing of the person
•It indicates a behavioural pattern
•It shows a lack of knowledge
•It shows a lack of observation of one's mind and its sensations
•It shows you behaviour that you should avoid
•It strengthens your mind
•It makes the love that you have unconditional.
The next time someone is rude, make sure you don't get upset. Just give them a broad smile. If you can digest the rudeness, nothing whatsoever can shake you.
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