Life is often been described as a journey with ups and downs, happiness & sorrows. If it is marriage of a close relative, it is a 'happy stimulus'; so is the birthday of a child in family. But there could be moments of sadness & devastation; death of someone close could be a 'sad stimulus'. We as individuals have no control on any of these stimuli. We have only control over how we respond to them. We may get sad, dejected, anxious, depressed, lonely, desperate or may consider them as 'inevitable events of destiny' and move on slowly getting them over.
Stimulus and response:
The theory of stimulus and response is crucial in life. While we do not have control on the former, we have full powers on our response. In other words, we can choose the 'response option' depending on how and what we see in each event of life. Being sad on these moments is normal but one can just consider them as a phase of life and move on.
Secret of happiness especially for elders:
If you want to be happy, enjoy every bit of it. It is difficult to enjoy the bad moments of life; one needs to overcome the grief as early as possible, move on and be happy. This is always a better way of traversing in life rather than getting submerged in past grief history and stuck in the mud. We have seen some of our members not being able to come out of certain grief incidents in their life (loss of spouse or children) and going into a zone of loneliness, anxiety and depression. But we also have stories of our members who could overcome the past sorrows quickly and moved on and then, enjoying their own journeys of life. And there is nothing wrong in it as every second of life’s journey is meant to be 'experienced' & 'enjoyed' and not wasted.
As we grow old, we may get news of a serious disease or death of the family members or friends but how we remain calm and composed and tide over the sorrows and move on is the biggest challenge of life. The test of leveraging the right option to respond, therefore, becomes crucial as we grow older.
The only way one can be happy is to develop a sense of enjoyment in whatever we see or feel or do. People who enjoy in what they do are, by and large, happy. If people do not enjoy what they do or they feel uncomfortable in doing a thing, they feel unhappy. The best way to live life is, therefore, is to enjoy every bit of it.
Chirpings of the bird, sound of rain, barking of a pet dog, baby's smile, excitement of a sports competition, gracious movement in classical dances, classical or film songs, everything in life is to enjoy. What we cannot enjoy is possibly the sad things happening around us. We must try to overcome the sad feelings and come back into our normal zone to proceed in life.
To sum up we can say, happy people are those who enjoy life to the full. We are born to live life fully; lets enjoy life despite its problems and issues.
(By Dr A K Sen Gupta, Chief Trustee, My Retired Life Foundation (MRLF). He may be contacted at aksengupta51@gmail.com or 98211 28103)
