As we age, society often reminds us of our limitations by labelling us as “old people”. But it is a question of mindset. If we start believing that age is just a number and we are, in fact, as old as we feel, it is the beginning of a happier life. This feeling by itself is a mantra for living life to the fullest, regardless of age. It is a change in attitude that helps us to enjoy life like a child.
Game of Mind:
We must understand that everything is in our mind. If we start believing we can do a task that is so called slightly difficult or adventurous at an elder age, it is the beginning of confidence that leads to a better life. This “self-belief” changes the whole attitude of looking at oneself, giving greater confidence to lead a purposeful life. Research has shown that people with a greater mind power of self-belief often tend to:
A.Live longer
B.Live happier
C.Stay more focused and develop a defined purpose
D.Have better relationships
In brief, a positive state of mind changes the way of looking at life from “fear and surrender” to “be confident and traverse with poise”.
Developing Youthful Attitude:
One of the powerful ways to develop a “stay young mindset” is to develop a youthful attitude. The axiom is to develop the spirit of “I can” moving away from traditional mindset of old age of “I cannot”. Some of the classical strategies to cultivate this youthful attitude would be to develop the following practices:
A. All elders must try to focus on “abilities” and “not on limitations”. It is necessary to focus on what you have and ignore what you do not. The elders may not have all the strength and power of young but will have some powerful traits / skills / physical organs with them and they should try to make maximum use of the same. The most important trait they will have is “cumulative knowledge” or “wisdom”.
B.They should continue to enjoy life the way they can and afford. If travelling is what they like, they should do; if eating food is what they cherish, they should continue engaging in it, and so on. Idea is to enjoy life to the full without grumble as it is only “one life”, and no one really knows what exists after that.
C.They need to be adventurous. This does not mean they should do things they cannot or should not. What it means is that they should develop mindset of an adventurist; the mindset of a persons who takes risk, takes life jovially and moves on despite adversities.
D.Refuse to be old: this is very important as once you feel you are old, you start behaving like an old. There is a lot of truth in that. Your body may age, but your spirit does not have to.
Staying Active, Staying Young: This should be the fundamental philosophy of life. One should be active in all domains: physical, mental and social. If one is keeping himself / herself in a zone of reasonable activity in all the above three spheres, there is no reason one cannot remain young in spirits and mind despite being old in age in terms of number. One cannot have eternal youth, but one can postpose to the extent possible being old and weary from the mental perspective. One, however, needs to slow down with age and do everything within permissible limits. For example, when one was younger, jogging every morning was easy, but in the older days, a brisk walk is just as good. One can stretch, move, and keep joints working. The old saying is true: “If you don’t use it, you lose it.” And the more you keep using your body, the younger you will feel.
But it is not just physical activity. Keeping mind active is just as important. One should make it a point to read every day, play some mind games, and stay engaged with the world around. There is nothing better than learning a few new things here and there. Learning new things, even at an older age, keeps mind sharp and spirit alive.
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Relationships and Connection:
One of the most important things one should understand is the role that relationships play in keeping us young. As people age, there is a tendency to withdraw, get isolated, sometimes by choice or by circumstance. But that is the easiest way to start feeling old.
One should make it a point to stay connected with friends, family, and community. There is something about sharing laughter and conversation with others that keeps elders feeling vibrant, no matter the age.
It is always good to be around younger people. Their energy is contagious! An elderly person may learn just as much from them as they might learn from him/her. One should again remember that age is just a number; it is how you engage with the world that counts.
Accepting the Inevitable:
Life of elders will be full of challenges. There are days when one may fall sick, or energy may not be what it used to be. And the toughest calamity will be loss of loved ones along the way. But it needs to be remembered that accepting these things with grace is part of “staying alive”.
Fighting against the inevitable is a losing battle. Instead, it is better to find peace in accepting that life, in all its stages, has its beauty. An elder’s philosophy should be to enjoy each day to the fullest, to find joy in the small things, and to focus on what he / she can still do, rather than what has been lost.
Final truth is that age is as much about the “heart and mind” as it is about the “body”. Yes, time will march on, and we cannot stop that. But we can control how we choose to experience it. If we focus on what keeps us feeling young, whether it is staying active, learning new things, maintaining relationships, or simply keeping a positive outlook, we will find that age is just a number. And no matter what that number is, the spirit of youth can remain with us as long as we nurture it.
By Dr A K Sen Gupta, Chief Trustee, My Retired Life Foundation (MRLF). He may be contacted at aksengupta51@gmail.com or 98211 28103
